In the Mist of Summer

While writing my friend back on facebook I stumbled upon my old school mates pictures. They are all laughing, having a good time in there bikinis and just being caught up in summer. I sooooo wish I was there, I wish I could throw on a bikini and go to the beach. I wish I had friends who would invite me to a bon fire and we'd all get drunk and have the times of our young lives.
There's so much I feel like I am missing out on. All I do is art. I don't have friends who party or go out. I'm missing my teen years. I don't ever do anything exciting and different. I won't ever feel comfortable in my own body around other people. I can't even feel comfortable around my parents. Everyone seems to have a say on my body except me. Like it's not even mine. I feel so shy and helpless. Just for a day I would like to experience life as a crazy, wild party teenager.

I can't even believe I am saying I want to be like them.

I guess I am saying I wish I was a popular/in the "in crowd"